68.
as
should my own husband become an Ionist--so the relationship was personal--I fear I would loose all my clinical object- iveness. And while I'd be the last person in the world I just know that I would be terribly jealous of "The other woman" in his life. On the surface women may not seem jealous of their spouses as husbands, but everything about our emotional make up tends to make us cling to a single object--anything that may make us lose that object is to be deeply feared, whether we realize it or not. It makes little difference whether there be an actual "other woman or whether it be an alter ego--each will serve to sever us from our love. So you see, Virginia, this is a very deep instinctive feeling, greater than we know, and impossible of rationalism. No normal woman can stand a rival for her husband's affections and no matter how many times she may tell herself that that rival is only her husband as a wo- man, and so not real at all, nevertheless the illusion of the real woman appears to her just as it does to the hus- band in his self-satisfaction, and that illusion is al- most as effective as the real thing. The only satisfac- tory mate for an Eonist is a woman who is herself abnormal in attitude in one way or another and such women are rare. ((I hope Judith, will forgive my inserting a comment right in the middle of her letter, but to put it elsewhere would lose continuity and force. I take exception on two counts: (1) A woman need not look on her husband's alter ego as a compeditor. She could see it as a compliment to her own femininity and a symbolic way of joining with her in a greater community of interests. If the husband assum- ed the feminine role all the time this would be another matter, but for most TVs, their masculine role is adequate and satisfactory to the wife so that she hasn't lost her husband, she has gained a girl friend with whom she can share some of her own outlook and feelings. This union of interest can, under the right circumstances, add greatly to the bond between the two personalities. (2) I dont thin that the ability to see more in Eonism than redic- ulous behavior and an implication of immorality (which is the way many people view the matter) is any indication of abnormality on the part of the wife. It is not really the